she cried

crying
as she stood beneath the hot, steamy stream
her heart let out a silent scream
and her tears began to graze her cheek
where the water had already been
she told herself she’d be stronger today
she’d hold her head high and give nothing away
because she deserved better and would have it
though all that she really wanted was him

 

Advertisements

letting go

goodbye

it’s not fair
the way you smile
and casually walk by me
as though you aren’t about to break my heart
into a million tiny pieces

i feel the breath rush out of me
and my lungs collapse in my chest
as the tears well up in my eyes
i hear the loudest silence
and i choke on it

i was never good at this
despite all of my practice
i always held on too tightly
afraid to let go
knowing the pain would come

in my mind it makes perfect sense
but my heart can’t understand
and i feel myself tremble
in the moments when i have to process
that the time has come

relativity sinks in
as i see our time in only a moment
and i beg the clock to stand still
just this once for me
but i know it will not

the heat in my brain turns to pain
and the pressure in my head
screams at me to calm my breathing
to just be still
to let this be

but there you are
smiling as if my world doesn’t feel
like it’s about to end
as if i’m not standing here
falling apart in front of you

i feel like a child
hearing my own voice whisper
please don’t go
as if there was anything i could say
to change your mind

your eyes are soft and knowing
and your hand on mine
makes promises that this is not goodbye
so i tell myself that it’s true
and there are more chapters to be written

i close my eyes
and i breathe you in
grateful for the moments we’ve collected
hoping there will be more
praying that this is not the end

I Envy the Birds

feather

It’s time that my wings
Lift me off the ground
These chains have gotten heavy
And I’m so tired of being bound
You know I’d love to stay
But the wind calls me away
Oh, I swear, someday
I’ll make it back around

I need to fly
To feel my wings against the sky
To race the wind
Until I feel free again
It’s gonna hurt, the tears will burn
But I need to live, to learn
I’m breathing but I need to feel alive
I need to fly